Because of the daily experience of dealing with Andy's Alzheimer's, it's hard to remember just how he "used to be." But God graciously gave me an encounter this week with a friend who knew us for a number of years. After asking how Andy was doing, he went on to remark how impressed he was with how Andy used to "star" in all those yearly Easter plays, memorizing all those lines and all the words to the songs he sang. I agreed that was impressive. That memory led to another one that I related to him. Andy used to like reading his Greek New Testament. He said he did it to keep his mind fresh in the language. I got out that Greek NT to look through it and sure enough, he had many notes in the margins - obvious that he spent time reading and studying the original language.

Impressive, right? It's a difficult language which is why you often hear the phrase: "It's like Greek to me."

The Sunday school class I attend has been doing the "No Guilt Book Club" this summer, where we've been taking turns to review books we've read and can recommend to others. I offered to take a turn which happened to be last Sunday. I reviewed the book, Be Still My Soul, edited by Nancy Guthrie. The book includes 25 authors, a few of whom are John Calvin, Martin Luther, Timothy Keller, Charles Haddon Spurgeon, who write about suffering. I gave a short background on my own situation, then used the book to share how those readings really ministered to me in my own suffering. It's such a blessing to have the examples of these Christian men and women who have gone through suffering through the centuries and have written about it for those of us who come after them. God is good. He knows our needs and is always "there" for us. Actually, he is "here" and "near." And there's nothing like suffering to know how needy and desperate we are and how close he is to the brokenhearted. I was really excited about this opportunity and happy to share some of the things I have learned and experienced through this journey.

Then the rest of the week was difficult. It feels like there have been another couple of steps downward in the progression of Andy's disease. Every night this week, he has sat at dinner with his eyes closed. I have to call his name to give him a bite. He'll open his eyes, take a bite, then close them again. Then the last two nights, as he continues to keep his eyes closed, he chews his food, but doesn't swallow. He chews and chews and chews while I wait to give him his next bite. I think last night he ate about 3 bites out of his whole meal. Tonight was a little better. He chewed and swallowed, finishing almost his whole plate of food. I spoke to the nurse about this, and she thinks he may have had a change in medications because he has been showing some combativeness. That is another disturbing detail.


Amy and her kids came down on Tuesday to visit. They met me at the house and hung out a while before going over to see Andy. Chase walked into the house with a Monopoly game under his arm. Amy explained that he wanted to play it with me. My heart sank. I do not like that game. It usually goes on interminably. But since I try to be a good Grammy (!), I agreed to play with him. Amy played with the two of us, which was kind of her to join me. Well, Chase being the typical competitive male, aggressively bought up the most expensive properties, then proceeded to buy up houses to jack up the price should anyone land on his property. As it turned out, Amy was the first to go bankrupt after landing on his place, and I wasn't far behind. Chase was so happy to have won, but secretly I was happy, too - not only because he was happy, but because that was the end of the game!

Our time with Andy was hard and we didn't stay long, but as we left, Amy gave Andy a hug and clear as day, Andy said: "I love you so, so much."

So there's the ebb and flow of life. I was reading an excerpt from Anne Morrow Lindbergh's, The Gift from the Sea. She was comparing the ebb and flow of the tides to our relationships with people, but I think it also applies to life in general. Life is fluid; sometimes we experience good times with few problems, other times, we struggle to keep our heads above water. She says that each cycle of the tide is valid, each cycle of the wave is valid. We can't change it, "it is what it is." But our acceptance of those changes and willingness to surrender to God's will in those circumstances is what makes the difference.

Another day, I read an excerpt from J.B. Phillips. He was a friend of C.S. Lewis and is known for his contemporary translation of the New Testament. He wrote that as he was translating Ephesians 2:4 where the text says that "God is rich in mercy," he was struck that this phrase was a "positive jewel...Just as we might say that a Texas tycoon is 'rich in oil,' so Paul writes it as a matter of fact that God is 'rich in mercy.' The pagan world was full of fear, and the Christian gospel set out to replace that fear of the gods or the fates, or even life itself, with the love for and trust in God. 'Rich in mercy' was good news to the ancient world and it is good news today."

Mercy is not the only quality that God is rich in. Ephesians 1:7 says that "God lavished the riches of His grace on us with all wisdom and understanding." And Psalm 145:8 says God is "rich in love."

"Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom." (Psalm 145:3)

As I was becoming an adult, in my teens, my sister and I were responsible to take care of the house so my mother would be available to help my dad with barn and field work. Sister loved to cook and bake and I loved to clean, organize and arrange things neatly. We had a convenient plan worked out so that the housework would be done between us, and we each did what we preferred.

Unfortunately, she didn't come with me when Andy and I got married. Unfortunately, because I had no experience with making a meal. Poor Andy had to put up with my learning to read recipes and make something tasty. I have to give him credit for his patience. In all the 44 years of our marriage, he only ever got up from the table once to make himself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Of course, I learned his likes and dislikes and made an effort to learn the art of cooking. But he was pretty patient with me.

I can get by, and even enjoy the kitchen now, but am by no means, anything special. You would think that since I don't have to cook for Andy any more, that I would welcome the break from that responsibility. But yesterday I was feeling like spending some time in the kitchen, so I made one of our favorite recipes: baked ziti. It makes a lot, even when I halve it, and I'll be eating it probably every day this coming week. I actually divided it into 7 meals and froze 3 of them to enjoy at a later date.

Dinner for 1 - a whole 13 x 9 pan all to myself. What was I thinking? It was more than enough - which reminded me that is how God's grace can be explained - more than enough!

Luke 6:38 ~ "Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over will be poured into your lap."

Psalm 23:5 ~ "You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil, my cup overflows."

Another day I thought I would indulge by making strawberry shortcake. It seemed like a wonderful idea since strawberries were in season.
 

 It was so good and I justified the sugar by eating it without whipped cream.

I am currently reading Spiritual Classics in my morning devotional time. I'm grateful that we have the writings from saints who lived and experienced life with God through the ages. What a blessing to have insights from others who loved and served God through the years.

Richard Foster is a theologian and author who has written a number of books, but this one is a compilation of different authors throughout the centuries. Here is a sampling of what I read last week.

"Give me Your grace, good Lord...to set my mind fast upon You...gladly to be thinking of God, piteously to call for His help, to lean into the comfort of God, busily to labor to love Him." (Thomas More, page 6)

"Contemplation involves giving ourselves time to relax in God's presence. In the quietness, aware of His presence, we open our hearts to His love. Our prayer is usually wordless and fed by a deep desire for Him. This leads us on to a place where instead of seeking God, we are found by Him. We discover that long before we came to our place of prayer, He was seeking us. So He responds to our longing. We bask in the warmth of His love. We feel His gaze on us. He fills us afresh with His Spirit. We receive a new perspective on life - His perspective. We draw so close to His heart that we sense His concern for the world and from our contemplation flows intercession as we catch His compassion for a hurting world." (Joyce Huggett, page 14)

"We find it difficult to give up our desire for things that can never satisfy us in order to purchase the one good in whom is all our joy - and in whom, moreover, we get back everything else that we have renounced besides." (Thomas Merton, page 18)

"God loves to love us far beyond our most extravagant hopes. At the very heart of the universe is God's utter compassion and loving care for all his creation. God delights to lead us into the 'dizzy heights of love' - to the extent that we welcome it and to the extent that we can stand it." (Richard Foster's reflections on Marguerite Porete's essay, page 27)

"Prayer is the precious fruit of the Word - Word of God that has become wholly our own and in that way, has been inscribed deep in our body and psyche, and that now can become our response to the love of the Father. The Spirit stammers it out in our heart, without our doing anything about it. It bubbles up, it flows, it runs like living water. It is no longer we who pray, but the prayer prays itself in us. The divine life of the risen Christ ripples softly in our heart." (Andre Louf, page 33)

And this is my favorite of the week:

"There is no great mystery concerning the will of God, in so far as it applies to our small selves. God's will is written into His nature, and the nature of God is LOVE." (Agnes Sanford, page 39)

When we think of God's will for us in this way, how can we be anxious about the future?

"'Thy will be done' - We are only absolutely infallibly certain of the will of God concerning the past. Everything that has happened, whatever it may be, is in accordance with the will of the Almighty Father. The future, also, whatever it may contain, once it has come about, will have come about in conformity with the will of God." (Simone Weil, page 49)

"God cared for His children [in the feeding of the 5,000] and could, did and would provide for their necessities...a throb of the Father's heart. Because we easily imagine ourselves in want, we imagine God ready to forsake us...Care for the next minute is just as foolish as care for the morrow - in neither can we do anything and in both God is doing everything." (George MacDonald, pages 79-83)

I'm so blessed by God's ministry to me. It's been such a struggle for me to not worry about the future. I need continual reminders that God's got this. The very nature of God is love, and all his actions toward his children are loving and kind.

I met with my attorney this past week and I was so encouraged by her assurances that things will work out financially. I'm not going into detail on the internet but will be happy to share those details with anyone who talks to me personally.

Last night when I woke up in the middle of the night, God brought to my mind Psalm 91:4; the picture of hiding under God's wings, being covered by his feathers. Doesn't that sound like a safe place to be?

I love God's word pictures that help us visualize his peace, his protection, his provision for us, the sheep of his pasture.
 

Random Ramblings

Everybody has trials and temptations
Everybody knows heart break, isolation 

But we can lay our burdens down (our burdens down)
Lay our burdens down 

What a friend we have in Jesus
East to west my sins are gone
I see grace on every horizon
And forever and ever His heart is my home 

Everybody has fears, everybody's got worries
Everybody knows sorrow, devastation 

But we can lay our burdens down (our burdens down)
Lay our burdens down

What a friend we have in Jesus
East to west my sins are gone
I see grace on every horizon
And forever and ever His heart is my home 

No more betrayal, for He is faithful
He fills me up and my cup runneth over
No more betrayal, for He is faithful
How He has proven it over and over
Over and over 

What a friend we have in Jesus
East to west my sins are gone
I see grace on every horizon
And forever and ever His heart is my home

Songwriters: Matt Maher / Adam Palmer / Matthew Hein / Abbie Parker

What a Friend lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Essential Music Publishing

I love that song. I've been reminded this week of the universal nature of trials, temptations, and suffering because I'm re-reading Be Still, My Soul. I have agreed to do a book review in our adult Sunday school class next week. In preparation, I have been ministered to all over again by the examples of God's people rising above their suffering to rest in God's perspective, purpose and provision in suffering.

I am not the only one who is suffering. Everyone from the beginning of time has suffered in some way. But what makes the difference is our response to that suffering. Can we submit to God's plan in our suffering, or do we become bitter and angry by what he allows? I desire a heart of submission because he knows what is best and promises to care for us. Jesus promised that in this world we would have trouble, but the good news is: he has overcome the world. Good news indeed! He is our friend, and goes with us on our journey through our suffering. He grieves with us and has promised to carry us and take our burdens on himself.

There are many benefits that we receive from the suffering we endure. One that I've noticed in myself is that I am so much more sensitive to the suffering others are experiencing. Even reading the story of Jesus' passion and crucifixion brings tears to my eyes. Did anyone experience more horrible suffering than Jesus? And he did it because of his great love for me.

Another benefit of suffering is that we come to know God better. We experience his comfort, his strength, his grace to endure. Hopefully, the impurities in our life are purged away and we become more like Jesus, who suffered without complaint and entrusted himself to his heavenly Father.

 A year ago, I planted this lace cap hydrangea so I was excited to see it had buds and was very close to full bloom. Then imagine my horror, when the next day I saw this:

 

Can you believe it? I would never have guessed that hydrangeas were tasty. I do not have warm fuzzy feelings for the deer. There is plenty of food available to them and lots of woods in the neighborhood. And don't tell me that I've taken over their habitat. That doesn't soothe my frustration over them destroying the beauty of my gardens.

Then last night I noticed this brave new bud. Hopefully, the deer have moved on to "greener" pastures and won't come back for one more flower. Even though I like to see deer, I am not happy that they eat my plants. 

Some time ago, Christy asked if I could take some of Andy's sermons and make them into recordings on cd. It had been so long since Andy had preached and even when he had, it had been pretty random and rare so I told her it couldn't be done. But God...

With Andy no longer living at the house, I gave our boom box to Amy. Later she asked me if I realized there was a tape in the cassette player with a recording of a church service where Andy was preaching. I couldn't believe it! I got the cassette from her and asked our A/V guy to record it onto a cd. He did and I have listened to it a number of times. I confess it was hard to remember when Andy had sounded so "life-like" and passionate about God and our worship of him. The recording was made in July 2000 - 18 years ago. What a gift!

Doesn't he look young and Pastor-ish?

I have continued to visit with Andy every day. I help him eat his dinner, then read to him as he lies on his bed. He almost always falls asleep as I read, which brings back more memories. Our family tradition when the girls were growing up was to spend our after dinnertime reading. The girls would sit next to me on the couch and Andy would invariably lie on the floor as I read. Also, invariably, he would fall asleep. Then when I would stop reading, he would wake up and wonder what he had missed. It didn't seem to matter how interesting or exciting the story was, he couldn't stay awake. He always insisted that it was my voice that was so soothing and calming. It was our little inside family joke: dad on the floor asleep while mom reads.

In our Sunday school class this morning, our teacher reviewed Augustine's book, Confessions. He gave several of Augustine's quotes for us to digest and discuss. One of those was:

"For who is the Lord but the Lord? For who is God except our God? The highest, the most good, the most mighty, the most omnipotent; the most merciful, yet most just; the most hidden, yet most present; the most beautiful, yet strongest; the stationary, yet incomprehensibly constant. You cannot change, yet you change everything. You are never new, yet never old. You make all things new, yet conquer the proud with old age before they know of its approach.

You are ever working yet ever at rest. You are still gathering yet you lack nothing. You are still supporting, filling, and overspreading; still creating, nourishing and maturing; still seeking although you have all things. You love without yearning, are jealous without bitterness; share our regret without self reproach; express anger without losing serenity.

When others fail to finish what they propose, your purpose remains unchanged. You receive what you found yet had never lost. You are never in need yet rejoice in what you gain. You never covet, yet exact excessive payments, so that you may owe. Yet who has anything that is not already yours? You pay debts when you owe nothing, but in remitting you lose nothing."

Isn't that great? So profound and insightful into who God is and what he is like.

Psalm 18:31 ~ "For who is God besides the LORD? And who is the Rock except our God?"

Psalm 145:3 ~ "Great is the LORD and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom."

 

I was looking forward to two days off this past week. There was a time when having two whole days to myself was like a little bit of heaven. Life was so busy with children, husband, house projects, family reunions, work, etc. etc. 

But that was a different season of my life. Life is very different now. I am always alone. I had things to do on Tuesday, but Wednesday was interminably long. It was too hot to be outside doing anything too strenuous. I went out as soon as I got up, thinking I would do some gardening. Just stepping outside the door was enough to change my mind. But how much is there to do in the house when it’s just me?

I thought about going somewhere and doing something, but then a part of me felt like I needed to just get used to being by myself. Self talk: Be content…trust God…it is what it is…be thankful you can have some quiet.

Maybe part of my problem is that I’m still coming down off the high of my Scotland trip. Life is back to the routine: work, going to see Andy, getting the oil changed in the car, taking care of things around the house and yard, fitting in family time with the kids and grandkids.

On July 1, we had a family party at Amy’s in Lancaster County to celebrate two kids’ birthdays. 

 

It was also an opportunity for Christy and Dawn to see Amy's new house. It was very hot that day so we stayed inside for the party. I was invited to drive up with Tommy and Dawn in their van, so that saved me the stress of 4 hours driving.

Then last week, Kira had 4 days of Horse Camp with riding lessons. I helped Dawn out by taking Kira and picking her up on Tuesday (since Dawn has all those kids she watches). I also picked Kira up on Thursday afternoon.

Also, on Tuesday, I went to see the Mr. Rogers documentary with a friend. It was such a warm, uplifting film and encouraging to know what a kind, gentle man he was.

On Saturday, I drove to Berks County to hang out with my family. It’s a 4^th of July tradition for us to have an annual picnic on the Saturday either before or after the holiday. I was going to drive up with Dawn and Tommy again, but on Friday night, they decided they weren’t going to go after all. It had been a busy week for them and 4 hours in the car with the children didn’t sound appealing. But I decided I would go by myself to avoid another day being at home alone. It was also a good opportunity to see my brothers and sisters and their spouses. I hadn’t seen them in a year. I’m glad I went. We had some good conversations catching up with each other. The weather was perfect and the food was plentiful and flavorful. My sister, chef extraordinaire, contributed more than her share.

When I woke up Sunday morning, I had a hint of a headache and was soooo tired. I went back to bed, but unfortunately, I forgot to turn off my alarm, so in 30 minutes, it went off again. I was still so tired so I went back to sleep. I think I might have been able to sleep all day, but I made myself get up and get moving. I have learned how beneficial and good for my soul it is to be with other people. Since it was Sunday, I had the opportunity of interacting and connecting with any number of people. And by lunchtime, I felt pretty good physically, and no more headache.

One person I spoke to, after inquiring about Andy, commented how impressed she was that I was always so cheerful. Ha! Well, that blessed me, and I refrained from telling her how I really felt earlier that morning.

So, life has its ups and downs.

In one of my conversations on Saturday with a niece, I mentioned how when life is tough, I’m so grateful that I have a blessed hope; that some day (in eternity) our troubles will be over.

Then I wondered if I was not being grateful for this day. Each day is a gift and there is always the opportunity to enjoy that gift and what we’ve been given. But that night as I was reading Life on the Highest Plane by Ruth Paxson before bed, I came across:

 "The believer's heart is set upon heavenly things; he values and seeks heavenly things more than earthly. 

Colossians 3:1-2 "Since then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things."

Do I hear someone say, This is too high a standard for me; it is not only impossible but unattractive. I am on the earth and in this world, therefore why should I not live as though I were and enjoy what this earth and this world have to give me and leave the enjoyment of heaven until I reach there? Such is the reasoning of vast numbers of Christians and their lives are in full harmony with their reasoning. As someone has aptly said they have become Christians much as a man takes out a life insurance policy--something that does not in any way alter one's manner of living but will be of use after death and is maintained with the payment of a yearly premium. With many a person becoming a Christian has made little if any difference in either his character or conduct. He is still of the earth--earthy.

Is it not conceivable that God would have us become acclimated to our eternal home in heaven with Christ during our transient stay on earth? If the atmosphere of heaven is stifling to me here what will it be to me there? If the heavenly pleasures and pursuits are unattractive to me now, what will they be to me then?...Death is both an exit and an entrance all in one. For the believer it closes the door on earth to open one into heaven. There is not one instant for preparation for that higher altitude. If my heart cannot stand it here, how will it stand it there?"

 A beautiful reminder that longing for heaven is not wishful thinking or escaping from reality. How kind of the Lord to speak peace to my soul. He's so good to me.

No matter how bleak and barren life might seem, where there's life, there's hope. I'm always so impressed at how life tenaciously holds on in the most unlikely places.

Bloom where you're planted - because God is there.

Scotland trip, part 2

Wednesday, June 13
Our lovely weather didn't last. It rained all day on Wednesday. Fortunately, most of our day consisted of driving. First stop was Glenfinnan to see the railroad trestle used for a steam engine that still runs. This scene was used in the Harry Potter movies and is a popular stop for tourists. We had to hike up a hill to see the train come along the viaduct. It would have been lovely except for the cold and wet and midges. I had my umbrella with me so I was somewhat protected from the rain, but the midges liked being under the umbrella with me. I got to the top of the hill but decided not to stay, even though the train was due momentarily. So I went back to the car and waited, then "stole" Christy's picture.

On the other side of the hill we climbed, looking the opposite direction was a monument erected to the battle that had taken place in this valley in support of Bonnie Prince Charles.

I couldn't help thinking as we experienced all these beautiful spots: "How sad that in all this beauty, so much bloodshed, unrest and strife had taken place."

Thursday, June 14
We woke in the morning to gale force winds and rain. We left our cozy cottage and were on our way in spite of the storm. All that rain produced some significant waterfalls down all the high hills.

We were in the car for quite a while, but eventually came to Loch Lomand...stopped to take some pictures then drove on to Stirling Castle. Loch Lomand is long (24 miles long) and narrow, so it felt like we were driving beside it for a very long way. We finally found a spot to park and get out to take pictures and explore.

The bonnie, bonnie banks of Loch Lomand

We spent a lot of time at Stirling Castle because it was so huge and rich in history.

"Stirling Castle, located in Stirling, is one of the largest and most important castles in Scotland, both historically and architecturally. The castle sits atop Castle Hill, an intrusive crag, …and is surrounded on three sides by steep cliffs, giving it a strong defensive position. Its strategic location, guarding what was, until the 1890s, the farthest downstream crossing of the River Forth, has made it an important fortification in the region from the earliest times.

Most of the principal buildings of the castle date from the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries. A few structures of the fourteenth century remain, while the outer defenses fronting the town date from the early eighteenth century.

Before the union with England, Stirling Castle was also one of the most used of the many Scottish royal residences, very much a palace as well as a fortress. Several Scottish Kings and Queens have been crowned at Stirling, including Mary, Queen of Scots, in 1542, and others were born or died there."

Scotland loves using the red lion and lots of unicorns in their tapestries and art work.

The Queen's bed

The Queen's desk

We had a delightful guide at Stirling Castle who explained the history and functions of the different parts of the castle. It was fun listening to her thick accent.

Robert the Bruce with Christy and me!

Two of Scotland's most famous battles took place at Stirling. In 1314, Robert the Bruce led the Scots to victory over the English. He was greatly outnumbered by the English, but was successful because of his military genius.

Friday, June 15
We arrived back in Edinburgh Thursday evening so Friday was spent exploring the city. Driving the streets is a nerve wracking experience: they're narrow, some are cobblestoned and there are lots of roundabouts. Narrow streets don't stop 2-way traffic or huge sight seeing buses. In the earlier part of the week, driving through the country, there was less traffic and the people were generally gracious with our touristy driving. The city was a different matter and was more like driving in Philadelphia or any large city with lots of traffic and people in a hurry. Being honked at, though, does not help you drive better. In my opinion, it only exacerbates the problem, because now, you're not only doing the wrong thing (according to the one who honked), but you're adding anxiety to the mix.

Edinburgh is a very old city, even what they call the "new town" was constructed in the mid-late 1700's. The buildings reminded us of down town Philadelphia, built in rows right against the sidewalks (no front lawns), made of stone, 3-4 stories high.

And above the town is the imposing castle. The day we were there, it was mobbed with tourists.

The castle was impressive and awesome but harder to enjoy because there were so many people...long lines to see everything. We did persevere, though, and stood in line to see the crown jewels. (no pictures allowed)

Holyroodhouse was next on our agenda. This is England's royal (currently Queen Elizabeth II) residence when they visit Scotland on official duties. I didn't take a lot of pictures of these buildings because it was raining but this hedge was so impressive. We determined it was made of beech trees, trimmed to perfection.
 

the tree trunks were so thick - obviously ancient

The castle gardens and greenhouses were fun to explore.

And to top it all off, they had a cafe there so we could sit in out of the rain and enjoy a "cuppa" tea/coffee with some Scottish shortbread. The girls enjoyed testing various flavors of tea, but I loved a "cuppa" mocha.

All the castles have so much history and are interesting in their own right. You would think that seeing so many of them, you'd eventually get bored of visiting one more. But that was not the case. At the Holyroodhouse, there were buildings that were built as early as the 1,000's. That's hard to fathom for us who come from such a "young" country.

ruins of the Abbey

Saturday, June 16
It rained all day which didn't stop us from walking all over town. I was still wearing flip flops and my feet were cold and wet all day. The sidewalks were slippery and I had to be very careful not to slip and fall, but at least my blisters weren't hurting.

Our first stop was the royal yacht, Brittania. Most of that tour was inside the yacht, although we did walk outside on the decks at several spots. The living space of the royals was quite nice - fit for a queen.

From the yacht we hopped on a bus to go to the botanical gardens. Some of the gardens were inside under roof, but we still had a lot of walking around outside.

Back in the city, we ran into a gay pride parade, but it was a peaceful mob so we popped into and out of shops continuing our hunt for souvenirs to buy. We happened upon a street magician and watched his show. Then we had our dinner at a pig roast restaurant called, "Oink, Oink!" To finish out our Scottish food experience, we went looking for a place that would provide us with the deep fried Mars bar. Yes, it's Scottish and believe me...it's decadently delicious. I'm sure it's right up there with Turkish Delight!

By the time we decided to call it a day, the buses had stopped running for the day. It was still raining, and since it was a very long walk back to our flat, we hailed a taxi. The price wasn't that bad, and we had an interesting conversation with the driver. He was asking us all kinds of questions about America which we didn't mind answering. But when he started talking about politics, I decided it was time to change the subject and asked him about England's royals. Fortunately, he took the bait until we arrived at our destination.

It was so good to get out of my wet flip flops, soak my feet in a hot tub, then get into slippers for the rest of the evening. After we arrived "home," the sun came out.

Sunday, June 17
Since our plane wasn't leaving till 5:00pm, we were able to fit in one more sight seeing adventure by going to the Tantallon Castle. This castle is mostly in ruins, thanks to Oliver Cromwell, sitting high on a promontory opposite from Bass Rock. This rock is the nesting site for 150,000 gannets every summer. We could see the tiny white dots flying over the rock and ocean but they didn't show up in the picture.

As always the castle was impressive, even in its ruins. We were able to climb to the top, but being so high gave me butterflies in the pit of my stomach. I can understand why they built those castle so high... you're able to see for miles around up there. I guess the builders weren't afraid of heights!

And so ended our Scotland trip. It was such a nice break for me, away from the routine and stress of my life and all I deal with every day. I also immensely enjoyed being with Christy and the girls. We had such a good time together, and I came home relaxed and at peace with my situation.

It's hard to believe it's already two weeks in the past, but I have a lot of pictures and memories that will keep me going for a long time. It was kind of the Lord to give me this gift.