Encourged

On Sunday, Andy and I drove up to Berks Co., Pennsylvania to spend the afternoon with my brothers and sisters.  We met together to discuss my mother's move to assisted living, her assets, the upcoming auction of her house and things.  It was a good time to be together and we came away very thankful for the relationships we enjoy with my siblings.  Not every family can tolerate being together, let alone have fun together and really like each other.  We are blessed.

Here is Andy with my brother, Wendell.
 

  We stopped in to see my mother before going to the sibling meeting. 
 

I think the picture of us together is pretty funny because she was always 4 inches taller than I was.  I think she's shrunk because I look like a giant next to her!  I hope I don't shrink 4 inches in the next 20 years...I can't afford to be that short!
 

 We had a very encouraging day yesterday.  Andy had an appointment with Dr. J, his neuropsychologist who diagnosed the Alzheimer's and Parkinson's.  We went prepared to let him know some of the things Andy was experiencing:  fatigue, frequent need for daytime naps, inability to exercise, occasional stiffness of joints.  As we were walking down the hallway back to his office, Dr. J. observed Andy's stride, then commented on it when we got in his office.  He mentioned that Andy was swinging his arms as he walked.  This is good because a symptom of Parkinson's is that the arms get stiff and rigid.  Dr. J. was encouraged that the medications are working.  As we got to talking, he asked if we would be open to physical therapy.  Oh yes, we would.  He gave us the name of an office and encouraged us to make an appointment.  He said they would work specifically in putting together an exercise program for Parkinson's patients.  So as soon as we got home, I made an appointment!  We are both excited about this.

The Alzheimer's is a different story, though.  I'd like to believe it isn't getting any worse and staying pretty stable.  But I'm not sure that would be accurate.  He often doesn't know what day it is.  He'll ask me several times what's on the agenda for the day, then doesn't seem to remember so he has to ask again...and again...and again.  I'm also needing to be more diligent in administering his medications.  Several months ago, I began putting all his pills in a weekly case (instead of depending on him to do it), with 2 compartments for each day, morning and evening.  He was doing well in taking them at the right time, but then at one point, he took his evening pills in the morning which really messed things up because it's not the same dose each time.  We got that one straightened out.  But then it happened again a week or so later, so I've had to tell him not to take any pills unless I give them to him. 

He continues to be a lot of fun to have around.  We laugh a lot at ourselves and our situation.  I'm so grateful for his acceptance of my new role of being in charge.  Sometimes I feel really bossy, and like I'm a drill sergeant or something.  But Andy is so kind and congenial about it.  He actually seems to like it.  He's becoming more dependent, looking for me to make the moves.  I still talk things over with him which can be quite an ordeal if he doesn't understand or gets confused.  But we keep working on it until the light dawns!  If it doesn't happen to dawn, we just forget it and I do what I think should be done.

Another encouraging event was that we also had an appointment with our life insurance guy yesterday.  He explained our financial situation to us and I think I understood it!  I had always let Andy and him meet, not really caring or interested in that level of discussion.  However, now I need to understand so I made the effort.  Our finance guy is also our friend and he genuinely cares about us and our situation.  I am humbled by the way he carefully explains our situation and yesterday, as he talked about the future, he actually teared up.  But he was very happy about where we are and what our future looks like.  I feel confident that we will be taken care of, if not from our assets, then the Lord will find another way.  We'll probably have to make some adjustments to our budget, but that's ok.

 Laughing about our situation reminded me of that verse describing the Proverbs 31 woman:  she laughs at the future because she is prepared.  Andy prepared for our future by buying our life insurance and the different perks that went with it.  I confess that early on, I wasn't too keen on making those payments.  The future seemed so far away and we really needed the money NOW.  But he had a lot of foresight and listened to advice, squirreling away our money for our future.  And now I see how wise he was and how grateful I am for his provision for me.  After our meeting yesterday, he feels so much more confident that I will be taken care of financially.  He's a good man!

Some Play Time

Just about the time we think life is leveled out and fitting into somewhat of a routine, something happens to upset that notion.  Andy and I had a discussion a couple of days ago that it seemed like the medicine he is on is helping him feel better.  And I think over-all, it is.  Or maybe we’re just getting used to the way things are now. 

Then Monday morning, at church, he seemed confused over everything he was involved with.  It was disconcerting to me and to those who were working with him.  We were giving him simple tasks, like putting away a large order of paper towels, TP, etc. He had to be told numerous times what he was supposed to do with things. 

I asked him a day or two later if he felt confused on Monday morning and he said he didn’t remember that he had been.  So I guess that’s good, at least.  I’m not sure why he would have been more confused on Monday morning than on any other day.  I can try to figure it out…maybe he did too much on Sunday and was extra tired.  But even in racking my brain, I couldn’t make much sense out of it.  He really hadn’t done that much on Sunday other than going to church, and he does that most days.  Of course, there was more social interaction.  Maybe trying to focus and appear aware in the crowd of people was overly taxing.  That does seem to require a certain amount of energy for him.  Who knows??? 

We had no appointments on Tuesday so I went and picked up Kira right after lunch to spend some time with us.  She was so excited, bouncing up and down when we got there and chattering the whole way home in the car.  As soon as we got home, she saw the neighbor girls out playing in their pool so she got her swimming suit on and went over to join them.  Andy is so good at playing with kids.  He jumped right in the pool and played with the girls.  He says he’s just a big kid that never grew up.  But he’s always had playful genes and been good with kids.  That’s why our grandkids love their PopPop!

 

 

 

 

 

I was reading again the little book, The Healing Power of Suffering.  It is an encouraging read to keep reminding me of Jesus’ involvement in our suffering.  (And I do need constant reminding.)  Jesus made it clear that suffering would be part of our lives.  He never promised us “flowery beds of ease,” just floating our way to heaven.  He came to earth to suffer.  The servant is not greater than his master.  If He suffered, how can we expect not to as well.

“We are not to be without pain.  Pain is Jesus suffering in us but we are to look to Him for strength and courage.  We are to learn this ability to shoulder our cross by gazing at Him and being gentle and humble in heart.

“When we are gentle our crosses do not anger us or cause us to rebel.  When we are humble we lovingly accept whatever the Father sends us.  We see His pruning hand in everything we do or suffer.  Only when we accept the sufferings in our lives with gentleness and humility will we be the recipients of the reward to follow:  “You will find rest for your souls.”  Lest we forget that our sufferings come from Him, He said, ‘Yes, My yoke is easy and My burden light.’  (Matthew 11:28-30).

“When we keep our eyes on Jesus, our sufferings are easier to bear.  The realization that nothing happens to us that is not good for our souls, and that in reality He also suffers what we suffer, makes the yoke of pain a light burden.”

These truths are not only helping to reduce the feeling of overwhelming stress at our situation, but to actually experience the rest for my soul that Jesus promises.

Psalm 62:1 – Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from Him.

Psalm 62:5 – Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from Him.

Psalm 116:7 – Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.

Work Projects

Andy is feeling better so I'm trying to give him projects to keep him busy.  Over the years he has remodeled every room in our house, added the in-law apartment and generally made our house a beautiful place to live.  He can no longer do those complicated projects but still likes to keep busy and be productive.  It's also helpful if I'm close by when he's working to offer encouragement and advice.  

One of those projects was to dig out the trumpet vine that has been growing on our trellis over the last couple of years.  Trumpet vine is invasive so when we planted it, we used plastic buckets to hopefully contain it and keep it from spreading where it wasn't wanted.  Hummingbirds are attracted to trumpet vine flowers which is why I planted it in the first place.  After a few years, however, I began to become somewhat disappointed in the way the trumpet vine "performed."  It became very woody on the stems and the vine itself was wild and crazy.  I kept trimming it back but then it didn't produce many blossoms.  So it seemed like a good time to try another plant in that spot.

It was labor intensive to dig out those buckets, but with Andy's muscles and my direction (!), we were successful.





In place of the trumpet vine, I planted morning glory seeds in two planters.  I'm thinking this is a good option because morning glories also attract hummers and they die out every year.  They are very fast growing and I'm excited to see what they look like full of flowers.

Another of his projects was to "remodel" the swing set.  He took that one very seriously.  He leveled it out so it wouldn't rock when kids were swinging.  We had replaced the canvas "roof" several times and it kept weathering and looking terrible.  So I asked him if he thought he could build a roof.  He worked at it for several days and was successful.  At one point, I asked him how it was going and he said it was "painfully slow."

Out with the old

In with the new

Granted:  the old canvas was more colorful...but the new real roof should last longer.  Good job, Andy!

I was happy with my lilacs this year.  They are filling out and bloomed nicely.  The white bush didn't bloom last year but it came through this spring!



We've been able to spend some time with our kids and grandkids.  Last Sunday we went to Lancaster County to attend church with Amy and her family.  After church, back at their house, Amy fed us lunch, then we went to Chase's baseball game.  That was fun watching those little kids play ball.  Andy has always enjoyed watching kids' teams play, even when we don't know any of those kids.  But this was a special game because of Chase.  He played really well, too, even going home with the game ball for being chose MVP.  Way to go, Chase.





The week before, we went to see Christy and her family, had lunch with them, then hiked on a trail near their house.  It was a beautiful day, so nice to be outside, just walking along enjoying the day and nature and each other.

I've begun reading a new book:  Loving Well by William Smith.


An encouraging read...Isaiah 53:3-5 tells us that Jesus was a "man of sorrows and familiar with suffering."  But he not only knows how it feels to suffer, he actually took our sufferings on himself:  "surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows..."  Hallelujah, what a Savior!

He continues to encourage us in our walk with him.