My journey this week followed a similar path, on a much smaller scale, Jesus' journey to the cross. The whole week I was reminded of how He suffered such distress and anguish, asking for the cup of suffering to pass by him, but humbly accepting the Father's will for him.
I seemed to be especially sensitive to the grief I was going through. I thought I had been through the worst of it, and it was behind me. But another wave of it came on me this week, maybe triggered because of my physical weakness due the cold I had. Whatever the reason, I was actually thankful for the experience because I was able to identify, even in such a finite way, what Jesus went through on my behalf.
I was lying in bed on Monday night thinking how lonely I was. There was no one in the bed with me, no one to have a conversation with, no one to reach out and wipe my tears away and hold me to tell me it would be ok.
And then just as God sent his angel to minister to and strengthen Jesus in the Garden (Luke 22:43), so God sent him angels to me. On Tuesday morning when I woke, I saw there was a note from a friend in my email in-bin. She wrote how she was praying for me and our family with the sweetest, kindest words. I was so blessed and encouraged.
The next day, I met with another friend - another angel - who hugged and encouraged me, as well. She reminded me that God knows that I am dust, it's ok to grieve, and God grieves with me.
And then as if that was not enough, God led me to purchase a new book: Shattered Dreams by Larry Crabb.
Right in the introduction was such truth, that I needed to hear again. Such precious life giving truth - why am I so prone to forget these beautiful, wonderful truths?
"There's never a moment in all our lives, from the day we trusted Christ till the day we see Him, when God is not longing to bless us. At every moment, in every circumstance, God is doing us good. He never stops. It gives Him too much pleasure. God is not waiting to bless us after our troubles end. He is blessing us right now, in and through those troubles. At this exact moment, He is giving us what He thinks is good."
In spite of the trial I am going through, God has given me eyes to see that I am truly blessed. Because of the cross, I enjoy a relationship with the God of the universe. He has given me a new nature, and I am clothed in the righteousness of Jesus Himself. This is the greatest blessing of all.
Beyond that, He has given me so many other blessings. I was able to enjoy working outside in my gardens this week. The weather is so beautiful and a lot of my bushes and trees are blossoming. (Of course, the weeds are proliferating, as well, but not for long! Let me at 'em!)
I was interested to note that there were a few leftover beauty berries from the winter. I'm glad the mockingbirds and non-migrating robins had enough to make it!
Our family was able to be together yesterday to celebrate the Easter weekend. In order to make it less stressful for everyone, we decided to just order pizza. I made two salads and we had ice cream for dessert.
The kids had a
lot of fun playing outside and the weather was perfect for that. Please
observe that it is important to dress appropriately when playing on the
swingset!
I told the girls that Andy always lights up when I mention them, and so we all decided to run on over to see him. Grace and Asher played, then some of the others played a piano piece or two. Asher is fearless and loves to play. The bench was a little high for him, but that didn't hinder him. He's amazing for only being 9.
I asked one of the staff to take a family picture. I was a little disappointed in how it turned out - somewhat fuzzy. I'm not sure how that happened. But at least we're all in it. And this is another blessing I enjoy - our family.
This morning I attended our Sunrise service. What a blessing to be reminded of the glorious hope we have because of the resurrection. This world is not all there is...one day, all our troubles will be behind us, we'll live forever in a perfect world with no more sorrow, no more tears, no more sickness and pain and with our blessed Savior forever and ever!
"'Death has been swallowed up in victory.' 'Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?' The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you." (1 Corinthians 15:54b-58a)
So in one sense, we are currently living in our own Good Friday, with sadness, despair, overwhelming disappointment. But Good Friday is not the end...Sunday's coming.
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