Suffering, Recipes, Kira and Morning Glories

The suffering saint has always interested me.  Even as a teen, I was drawn to reading biographies of pastors and Christians thrown in Siberian prisons or Nazi death camps.  What is it about suffering that is so fascinating?  Isn't it because of the human capacity to survive and even thrive in the most horrendous circumstances?  The Hiding Place made a deep impression on me as I read how Corrie and Betsy ten Boom trusted God and were able to thank God for major annoyances, like fleas.  The fleas were a blessing to the women because it kept the lecherous guards out of the female bunks.

God continues to stretch and encourage me in this sphere of thinking.  I have been classifying my own suffering as less significant than being thrown in prison for my faith.  Many passages in the Bible, the gospels, James and 1 Peter specifically give encouragement to Christians suffering persecution.  My suffering is not because of my faith, but physical.  However, I was encouraged recently as I was reading Timothy Keller's book, Walking with God through Pain and Suffering.  He used Job as an example, and what an example!  Job was not suffering for his faith.  God called him a righteous man and boasted of his goodness to Satan.  All suffering is suffering, there are no degrees with God.  He is equally compassionate and gracious, no matter what kind of suffering we are experiencing.  So my suffering is legitimate suffering.  I do not need to minimize, negate or explain it away.

Keller quotes Elisabeth Elliot, who is herself a victim of dementia now, in her book, Through Gates of Splendor:  "God is God.  If He is God, He is worthy of my worship and my service.  I will find rest nowhere but in His will, and that will is infinitely, immeasurably, unspeakably beyond my largest notions of what He is up to."  I am finite, His ways and thoughts are infinitely higher than mine. 

I decided to read One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp again.  She writes on the importance of thankfulness and how it changes our perspective.  There is every reason to be thankful.  Life is a gift.  We enjoy so many blessings from God's hand.  Even things that seem hard can be a blessing.  So how can I thank God for our current situation? 

1.  I am thankful that I have this time with Andy.  He did not die suddenly so we still have time to enjoy our relationship and have fun together.
2.  I am thankful for Andy's acceptance of his illness.  He is not bitter, resentful and angry but desirous of bringing glory to God even through this.
3.  I am thankful that Andy seems better physically than he was a year ago.  Perhaps the medication is helping, perhaps people's prayers are being answered, perhaps...
4.  I am thankful that social security benefits were granted.
5.  I am thankful that the stress of Andy's job has been relieved.
6.  I am thankful for God's provision of grace, strength to endure, encouragement from His word.
7.  I am thankful for our many friends and family members who support and love and care for us.

And I could go on.

I have been getting back to my interest in cooking and baking again.  My neighbor's garden is producing tons of zucchini so I have been experimenting with different recipes.  This is a super delicious one:

Tomato Zucchini Casserole

1 1/2 cups grated Cheddar cheese 1/3 cup grated Parmesan cheese 1/2 teaspoon dried oregano 1/2 teaspoon dried basil 2 cloves garlic, minced salt and pepper to taste

2 medium zucchinis, thinly sliced 5 plum tomatoes, thinly sliced 1/4 cup butter 2 tablespoons finely chopped onion 3/4 cup fine bread crumbs

Directions:

1.	Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). Lightly butter a 9x9-inch pan.
2.	In a large bowl, combine Cheddar, Parmesan, oregano, basil, and garlic. Season with salt and pepper, and set aside.
3.	Arrange half of the zucchini slices in the pan. Sprinkle 1/4 of the cheese and herb mixture on top. Arrange half of the tomatoes, and top with another 1/4 of the cheese mixture. Repeat layers.
4.	Melt butter in a skillet over medium heat. Stir in onions, and cook until soft and translucent. Stir in breadcrumbs; cook until they have absorbed the butter. Sprinkle on top of casserole.
5.	Cover loosely with foil, and bake in a preheated oven for 25 minutes. Remove foil, and bake until the top is crusty and the vegetables are tender, about 20 minutes. This was sooooo good.

I tried a cookie recipe that used zucchini.  They were ok - they had chocolate chips, zucchini, oatmeal and dried cranberries in them.  I wouldn't call them a favorite and not even sure I would try this recipe again, but you can't go too far wrong with chocolate!  And they're colorful - surely that counts for something.

Zucchini Cookies with Chocolate Chips and Dried Cranberries

Yield: 2 1/2 dozen cookies
Cook Time: 15 minutes

Ingredients:

1 ¼ cups all purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
3/4 teaspoon cinnamon
4 tablespoons unsalted butter, at room temperature
1/2 cup light brown sugar
1/4 cup granulated sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 large egg
1 cup shredded zucchini
2 cups old fashioned oats
1 cup semisweet chocolate chips
3/4 cup dried cranberries

Directions:

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper or a silicone baking mat. Set aside.
2. In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, baking soda, salt, and cinnamon. Set aside.
3. In a large mixing bowl, combine butter and sugars, mix until smooth. Add egg and vanilla extract. Next, add the shredded zucchini. Mix until combined.
4. Slowly add flour mixture until just combined. Stir in oats, chocolate chips, and dried cranberries.
5. Drop cookie dough by heaping tablespoonfuls 2 inches apart onto baking sheets that have been lined with parchment paper or Silcone baking mats. Bake for 15 minutes or until golden. Remove cookies from pans; cool completely on wire racks.

And of course, in the summer, I like to experiment with different kinds of salads.

This is a favorite, combining chicken and potatoes in the one dish (served with a side of zucchini bread - what else):

GRILLED CHICKEN SUMMER SALAD

  2-3 chicken breasts (or 1 can from Trader Joe's)

¼ cup chopped fresh dill

¼ cup olive oil

2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice

1 large shallot, finely chopped

3 teaspoons grated lemon peel

3 tablespoons mayonnaise

3 tablespoons sour cream

3 celery stalks, thinly sliced

1 pound red-skinned potatoes, unpeeled, cut into ½ inch cubes

Steam potatoes until just tender, about 12 minutes.  Transfer to large bowl; sprinkle with salt and pepper.

Grill chicken.

Combine dill, olive oil, lemon juice, shallot and lemon peel, mayonnaise, & sour cream in large bowl.  Season with salt and pepper.  Add chopped celery, chicken & potatoes.  Mix all ingredients together.

It seems like our day off is always consumed with doctor's appointments and catching up on housework and errands.  So I was really disappointed this week when Dawn called to ask if we wanted to take Kira to see a movie.  I had to tell her we couldn't because our day was already planned for us.  But later in the week, Thursday afternoon, we stopped in and asked if Kira wanted to go with us to the park for a hike and to play on the swings.  So we did get to spend some time with her there as well as take her to Chick-Fil-A for dinner.

I am enjoying the beauty of our garden.  The morning glories I planted are stunningly gorgeous.   God has given us all things richly to enjoy. And as icing on the cake of our life, today's worship service included the song, Jesus, Thank You:  VERSE 1 The mystery of the cross I cannot comprehend The agonies of Calvary You the perfect Holy One, crushed Your Son Who drank the bitter cup reserved for me CHORUS Your blood has washed away my sin Jesus, thank You The Father’s wrath completely satisfied Jesus, thank You Once Your enemy, now seated at Your table Jesus, thank You VERSE 2 By Your perfect sacrifice I’ve been brought near Your enemy You’ve made Your friend Pouring out the riches of Your glorious grace Your mercy and Your kindness know no end BRIDGE Lover of my soul I want to live for You © 2003 Integrity’s Hosanna! Music (ASCAP)/Sovereign Grace Worship (ASCAP). He is constantly pouring out the riches of His glorious grace and we do, indeed, know His unending mercy and kindness. How good is the God we adore!

Summer Fun

I took a vacation day on Wednesday since the boss is away this week and next.  Between him being gone and it's being summer time, work is pretty sparse so it's a good time to take off.  Andy and I left early Tuesday afternoon to get Naomi and bring her back for an overnight with us.  She is such a delight.  Never a dull moment with her.  Each of the grandkids is special in his/her own way.  What I love about Naomi is that she always has something to say.  She is never bored or boring.

With her here we had her favorite dinner:  chicken noodle soup.  It felt a little strange having soup on a hot summer evening, but we compensated by having bowls of ice cream afterwards and watching the movie, Ice Age.  She played plenty of free cell games on the computer and lots of card games with me.  She taught me a new one called "stress."  It did cause me a lot of stress and I lost quite a few of those games.  We also played greedy and parcheesi.  In the end, I won some and she won some so it was all ok in the end.



As we were eating our lunch on Wednesday, I mentioned that since it was so hot, it was a shame Naomi hadn't brought her bathing suit so we could go to the neighbor's pool.  She immediately said she wouldn't mind swimming in her clothes.  So off we went.  That was a really good idea because she and Andy had a lot of fun cooling off in the water.

 Too soon it was time to return her to her family.  She begged us to keep her a few more days and nights but all good things must come to an end.  Back at her home, when we got there, the kids got out their instruments and gave us a little concert.

 

They are amazingly good and it was an enjoyable evening.  Even Claire is learning rhythm and was happy to demonstrate.

All too soon the fun had to end and I had to go back to work the rest of the week.  But Saturday we went to Dawn & Tommy's for Kira's birthday party.  They borrowed our tent and Tommy had all kinds of games and activities planned for the kids as well as the adults.  It was a very fun day.

 
 

 
 It was a great day to be together.  We got to see all 3 of our girls and 8 out of 10 grandchildren.  The rain held off until 1:00, then it poured in earnest and the party was over in a hurry!

The blessings of heaven

God is opening up the windows of heaven and pouring out his blessings on us.

Our church family is loving us in many tangible ways.  In mid-May, the pastors and deacons gave the church the opportunity to express their love to Andy and me by giving us a love offering.  The response was unbelievable, overwhelming and very humbling.  We have not technically received the money yet because they're trying to research the best way to give it to us so that we will not be taxed on it.  Their love and care for us and our needs have been amazing.  We are so close to having our mortgage paid off - only 3 years left on it at our current monthly payment.  However, now that Andy doesn't have a salary, just disability (considerably lower than his salary was), we are not able to make a payment that steep.  BUT God had this all figured out.  Two of the deacons in our church met with us and suggested we contact our bank to see if they would give us a loan modification because of our "hardship."  We have been consistent with our mortgage payments, even making extra payments on the principle, so there is certainly nothing wrong with our credit.  When I called them, they sent out paperwork, which I promptly filled out and returned to the bank.  And we just received word that they are going to reduce our payment by $1,200 a month and not charge any fees or closing costs to do this.  Wow!

Early in the year, before lawn mowing time, Andy and I were wondering how we were going to take care of our lawn this summer.  Our riding mower is 21 years old this year.  Even with Andy being very methodical about maintenance and repairs, in recent years, it seems like we were taking it to the repair shop at least once a season to have something fixed.  But that was when we had Andy's truck and he was able to transport it to the shop and back home again.  Now we don't have the truck and we weren't sure if Andy would even be able to do minor maintenance on the mower, as well as take it to be repaired if it needed it.  BUT God had this all figured out.  In the spring, a deacon contacted the church's lawn service to ask if they would do our property every week after they were finished at the church.  Our lawn never got such great care.  They weed whack around every tree and bush (and there are lots of those!), mow the acre of ground, vacuum all the porches, patios, and even the deck.  And all that in about 30 minutes.  (It took Andy and I an hour and a half when we worked together.  And if I did it all myself, it took me 3 hours!)  And the best part - they're not charging us or the church.  What a gift.

And on Monday, I bought a new car.  Our car savings fund was accumulating and I was eager to spend it (ha, ha).  I was thinking our Camry was getting old with over 106,000 miles on it and with Andy not as tuned into the maintenance, it might be a good time to invest in a new car.  I talked to Dawn about it and she was excited to start researching what kind I should get.  She had just bought a Toyota Prius in October and was very happy with it.  Dawn was every bit as prepared as Andy ever was when we went to make a large purchase.  (She must have inherited that from her dad.)  She called several Toyota dealers on Monday, checked out what my Camry was worth, etc.  What a wheeler dealer she is and it was great fun hanging out with her at the car dealer's watching her work on my behalf.  We came away quite satisfied that we got a good deal from our trade in, as well as 0% financing.  I didn't need to finance at all, could have paid a different way, but why not take advantage of the 0% financing (free money!).  So here it is - a winter gray metallic 2014 Toyota Prius.  It gets 50 mpg and Dawn says she only fills her gas tank once a month.  Just think of the savings I'll be enjoying.

It's pretty shiny.  I'm hoping I can go a long while without getting any scratches or dents in it.

And in the area of Andy's physical state, we are encouraged with how the medicine seems to be working.  We also had 2 sessions of physical therapy so far this week with another session scheduled tomorrow.  The physical therapist has been very helpful, tailoring an exercise program specifically for Parkinson's patients.  Parkinson's Disease causes stiffness and rigidity so that the limbs draw inward.  In Andy's sessions he is being encouraged to make large movements, stretching his arms upwards to the sky, taking long strides (power walking).  Being aware of what the disease does is helpful in trying to compensate and work at overcoming the limitations.The physical therapist is also giving ideas on brain stimulation.  She suggested word games which made me laugh.  Andy has never liked word games - that's my thing!  But there are still other games that would stimulate his thinking.  There are lots available online - we just need to tap into them.

I've been reading a new book by Timothy Keller:  Walking with God Through Pain and Suffering.  I like everything he writes and am enjoying the encouragement God is giving me through this book.  How comforting to know that God is involved with our suffering.  He suffers with us, walks with us in our suffering and understands because he suffered, too.

A dear friend who is also going through great suffering introduced me to an old hymn - one I hadn't heard before:  How Good is the God we Adore.  The words really ministered to me and I memorized it to sing every morning:

How good is the God we adore
Our faithful, unchangeable Friend
His love is as great as his power
And knows neither measure nor end.

For Christ is the first and the last
His Spirit will guide us safe home
We'll praise him for all that is past
And trust him for all that's to come.

I hope that this can be my new theme song.  I want to be characterized by praising him for all that is past, as well as trusting him for the future.

Recent Events

It's been an eventful couple of weeks.

We have 3 birthdays in June:  Naomi, Chase and Joanna.  Amy had a party for Chase and Joanna on Saturday, June 28th.  I had planned to have Naomi overnight on Friday, then all day Saturday and take her along to the party.  However, Andy didn't feel well all day Friday and into the night.  So we had to do a rain check for Naomi.  But we were still able to do the party on Saturday.  Chase had turned 8 and Joanna is now 6.  How the years fly by.

The kids had fun playing in the pool and holding Dawn's baby, and the adults enjoyed chatting, eating and admiring Amy's gardens.

My mother moved to her assisted living apartment this weekend and is very happy there.  It was quite a project to go through all her things and decide what to keep, what to sell and what to give away.  I was fortunate enough to get an old clock that still works.  It had been a wedding present to my grandparents who got married on January 1, 1928.  I found just the spot for it.  I have decided not to wind it up because it chimes every hour on the hour and half hour.  I'm afraid it would wake me up all night long.  I will probably wind it up for the kids when they're here, then stop it when they leave.

We had been feeling the need to get some masonry work done.  When we first built the in-law addition and put in the new garage, we built the driveway around a huge maple tree.  I loved it and didn't want to cut it down even though I was told it probably would die because of all the pavement around it.  But I really wanted to try to save it so we had the driveway go around the tree.  Well, "they" were right and the tree did not do well so we had Christian cut it down a couple years ago.  Meanwhile, that cut-out in the driveway needed to be filled in.  It was difficult for Dad to maneuver his truck around that cut out.  At the same time our chimney was starting to look ragged.  The paint was chipping and the corner bead was exposed and rusting.  So one day when I got home from work, Andy showed me the local newspaper ads with masonry and brickwork contractors.  I called and got 5 estimates, then decided on one that I had the most confidence in.

We are very happy with how those two projects turned out.

It should be easier for Dad to get his truck in and out now.

 

 

The contractor gave us a guarantee that the chimney will last our lifetime and never need any more maintenance.

On the 4th of July, Andy and I drove up to Berks County and spent 4 hours with my brothers and sisters and our annual picnic.  It is such a blessing to have a good time together with them.  Our only child able to attend this year was Amy and her family.  She is such fun with the most interesting stories!  It ended up being pretty "cold" that day, but some of the kids still went swimming.  The adults were all sitting around with sweaters on!

On Saturday, July 5th, C and C came down.  Christian did tree work all day, trimming dead wood off our elms and making sure no branches were touching the house.  What a lot of work that was.  He did all the trimming, Andy worked all day at dragging the branches to the street.

Christian up in the nifty lift-y

I fed everyone lunch and dinner.  Naomi was a good helper in the kitchen.

 

Claire is actually holding a chicken!

What a pleasant day it was, sunny but not hot, with a nice breeze.  Perfect for eating on the deck.  We didn't get all the branches cleaned up on Saturday - just too tired, but finished up on Sunday afternoon.  Whew...what a lot of work.  So glad to get it done, though.

I'm finally getting some blooms on my morning glory vines.  But I am sorry to say that we did not get rid of the trumpet vine.  Somehow it managed to hang on to some roots and is sending out runners that are coming up everywhere.  I am constantly looking for them and digging them out, but I have a feeling this is going to be an ongoing battle.

Well, maybe it's a good thing for me not to become too complacent.  It's good to have a mission in life.  So I guess my current mission is to rid the world of weeds and invasive plants - at least in my little corner of the world.

Encourged

On Sunday, Andy and I drove up to Berks Co., Pennsylvania to spend the afternoon with my brothers and sisters.  We met together to discuss my mother's move to assisted living, her assets, the upcoming auction of her house and things.  It was a good time to be together and we came away very thankful for the relationships we enjoy with my siblings.  Not every family can tolerate being together, let alone have fun together and really like each other.  We are blessed.

Here is Andy with my brother, Wendell.
 

  We stopped in to see my mother before going to the sibling meeting. 
 

I think the picture of us together is pretty funny because she was always 4 inches taller than I was.  I think she's shrunk because I look like a giant next to her!  I hope I don't shrink 4 inches in the next 20 years...I can't afford to be that short!
 

 We had a very encouraging day yesterday.  Andy had an appointment with Dr. J, his neuropsychologist who diagnosed the Alzheimer's and Parkinson's.  We went prepared to let him know some of the things Andy was experiencing:  fatigue, frequent need for daytime naps, inability to exercise, occasional stiffness of joints.  As we were walking down the hallway back to his office, Dr. J. observed Andy's stride, then commented on it when we got in his office.  He mentioned that Andy was swinging his arms as he walked.  This is good because a symptom of Parkinson's is that the arms get stiff and rigid.  Dr. J. was encouraged that the medications are working.  As we got to talking, he asked if we would be open to physical therapy.  Oh yes, we would.  He gave us the name of an office and encouraged us to make an appointment.  He said they would work specifically in putting together an exercise program for Parkinson's patients.  So as soon as we got home, I made an appointment!  We are both excited about this.

The Alzheimer's is a different story, though.  I'd like to believe it isn't getting any worse and staying pretty stable.  But I'm not sure that would be accurate.  He often doesn't know what day it is.  He'll ask me several times what's on the agenda for the day, then doesn't seem to remember so he has to ask again...and again...and again.  I'm also needing to be more diligent in administering his medications.  Several months ago, I began putting all his pills in a weekly case (instead of depending on him to do it), with 2 compartments for each day, morning and evening.  He was doing well in taking them at the right time, but then at one point, he took his evening pills in the morning which really messed things up because it's not the same dose each time.  We got that one straightened out.  But then it happened again a week or so later, so I've had to tell him not to take any pills unless I give them to him. 

He continues to be a lot of fun to have around.  We laugh a lot at ourselves and our situation.  I'm so grateful for his acceptance of my new role of being in charge.  Sometimes I feel really bossy, and like I'm a drill sergeant or something.  But Andy is so kind and congenial about it.  He actually seems to like it.  He's becoming more dependent, looking for me to make the moves.  I still talk things over with him which can be quite an ordeal if he doesn't understand or gets confused.  But we keep working on it until the light dawns!  If it doesn't happen to dawn, we just forget it and I do what I think should be done.

Another encouraging event was that we also had an appointment with our life insurance guy yesterday.  He explained our financial situation to us and I think I understood it!  I had always let Andy and him meet, not really caring or interested in that level of discussion.  However, now I need to understand so I made the effort.  Our finance guy is also our friend and he genuinely cares about us and our situation.  I am humbled by the way he carefully explains our situation and yesterday, as he talked about the future, he actually teared up.  But he was very happy about where we are and what our future looks like.  I feel confident that we will be taken care of, if not from our assets, then the Lord will find another way.  We'll probably have to make some adjustments to our budget, but that's ok.

 Laughing about our situation reminded me of that verse describing the Proverbs 31 woman:  she laughs at the future because she is prepared.  Andy prepared for our future by buying our life insurance and the different perks that went with it.  I confess that early on, I wasn't too keen on making those payments.  The future seemed so far away and we really needed the money NOW.  But he had a lot of foresight and listened to advice, squirreling away our money for our future.  And now I see how wise he was and how grateful I am for his provision for me.  After our meeting yesterday, he feels so much more confident that I will be taken care of financially.  He's a good man!

Some Play Time

Just about the time we think life is leveled out and fitting into somewhat of a routine, something happens to upset that notion.  Andy and I had a discussion a couple of days ago that it seemed like the medicine he is on is helping him feel better.  And I think over-all, it is.  Or maybe we’re just getting used to the way things are now. 

Then Monday morning, at church, he seemed confused over everything he was involved with.  It was disconcerting to me and to those who were working with him.  We were giving him simple tasks, like putting away a large order of paper towels, TP, etc. He had to be told numerous times what he was supposed to do with things. 

I asked him a day or two later if he felt confused on Monday morning and he said he didn’t remember that he had been.  So I guess that’s good, at least.  I’m not sure why he would have been more confused on Monday morning than on any other day.  I can try to figure it out…maybe he did too much on Sunday and was extra tired.  But even in racking my brain, I couldn’t make much sense out of it.  He really hadn’t done that much on Sunday other than going to church, and he does that most days.  Of course, there was more social interaction.  Maybe trying to focus and appear aware in the crowd of people was overly taxing.  That does seem to require a certain amount of energy for him.  Who knows??? 

We had no appointments on Tuesday so I went and picked up Kira right after lunch to spend some time with us.  She was so excited, bouncing up and down when we got there and chattering the whole way home in the car.  As soon as we got home, she saw the neighbor girls out playing in their pool so she got her swimming suit on and went over to join them.  Andy is so good at playing with kids.  He jumped right in the pool and played with the girls.  He says he’s just a big kid that never grew up.  But he’s always had playful genes and been good with kids.  That’s why our grandkids love their PopPop!

 

 

 

 

 

I was reading again the little book, The Healing Power of Suffering.  It is an encouraging read to keep reminding me of Jesus’ involvement in our suffering.  (And I do need constant reminding.)  Jesus made it clear that suffering would be part of our lives.  He never promised us “flowery beds of ease,” just floating our way to heaven.  He came to earth to suffer.  The servant is not greater than his master.  If He suffered, how can we expect not to as well.

“We are not to be without pain.  Pain is Jesus suffering in us but we are to look to Him for strength and courage.  We are to learn this ability to shoulder our cross by gazing at Him and being gentle and humble in heart.

“When we are gentle our crosses do not anger us or cause us to rebel.  When we are humble we lovingly accept whatever the Father sends us.  We see His pruning hand in everything we do or suffer.  Only when we accept the sufferings in our lives with gentleness and humility will we be the recipients of the reward to follow:  “You will find rest for your souls.”  Lest we forget that our sufferings come from Him, He said, ‘Yes, My yoke is easy and My burden light.’  (Matthew 11:28-30).

“When we keep our eyes on Jesus, our sufferings are easier to bear.  The realization that nothing happens to us that is not good for our souls, and that in reality He also suffers what we suffer, makes the yoke of pain a light burden.”

These truths are not only helping to reduce the feeling of overwhelming stress at our situation, but to actually experience the rest for my soul that Jesus promises.

Psalm 62:1 – Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from Him.

Psalm 62:5 – Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from Him.

Psalm 116:7 – Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.