There didn't seem to be anything in particular, maybe just everything in general, but Friday felt especially heavy to me. My natural response wants to figure out why I'm dealing with these feelings. Why do I feel like crying when nothing has happened to add to what I'm already going through. Oppressive humidity? Attack from Satan? Lack of sleep? In this case, though, I have to be satisfied with no answer. I just don't know.
But as usually happens when I'm feeling low, God provides the encouragement I need at the precise moment of my need. I am currently reading Liturgy of the Ordinary by Tish Harrison Warren.
She writes about God being a part of every detail of our lives: when we wake in the morning, when we lose our keys, when we eat leftovers, when we sit in traffic...
In her chapter, Sitting in Traffic, she focuses on patience and being unhurried. I had heard a phrase in a song, and I don't remember which song at the moment, about God always being on time, never late. Trish reminds us that "we live in a waiting world, a world where time itself, along with all of creation, groans as in childbirth, waiting for something to be born." We live our lives each day in light of a future reality. Our best life is still to come. But in the middle of waiting for that future hope, are we patiently enjoying the days we have in the present? Waiting itself can be a gift. Our waiting is active and purposeful...God is at work in us and through us as we wait. A couple of days ago, I was struck with a feeling of expectancy as I wait for God to work things out for me. He is so creative in the way He works, not tied to uncertainty, but the Sovereign Ruler of all things, working for the good of his children. In my own perception of things, my situation looks hopeless...but that is not taking into account God and His divine purposes.
Recently I've noticed Steven Curtis Chapman's Glorious Unfolding being played frequently on KLOVE. It was recorded in 2013 so I really don't know why I hadn't heard it until recently. But it has spoken to me and been an encouraging reminder to me.
Lay your head down tonight
Take a rest from the fight
Don't try to figure it out
Just listen to what I'm whispering to your heart
'Cause I know this is not anything like you thought the story of your life was gonna be
And it feels like the end has started closing in on you
but it's just not true
There's so much of the story that's still yet to unfold.
And this is going to be a glorious unfolding
Just you wait and see and you will be amazed
You've just got to believe the story is so far from over
So hold on to every promise God has made to us
And watch this glorious unfolding.
God's plan from the start
For this world and your heart
Has been to show His glory and His grace
Forever revealing the depth and the beauty of
His unfailing love
And the story has only begun
We were made to run through fields of forever
Singing songs to our Savior and King
So let us remember this life we're living
Is just the beginning of the beginning
Of this glorious unfolding
We will watch and see and we will be amazed
If we just keep on believing the story is so far from over
And hold on to every promise God has made to us
We'll see the glorious unfolding
Songwriter: Steven Curtis Chapman, copyright BMG Rights Management US, LLC
That's right: Don't try to figure it out. Someday it will all be unfolded and we'll be amazed at the glorious plan of God.
I was able to have some family time on Tuesday when I drove up to Lancaster County to spend a couple of hours with Amy and her kids. They've been doing a lot of work to finish the upstairs of their new house as well as doing some outside projects. It was a joy to see those projects and be with her and the kids in person. After lunch we investigated a new park Amy had found. There was a huge lake that was an opportunity for the kids to fish and explore. There was also a paved trail around the park that we hiked. The sun was hot but the breeze was cool and refreshing. Amy and I stayed in the gazebo to chat while the kids played and fished at the lake.
Amy and I were amused with the momma duck and her babies on the lake. Whenever Chase would cast his fishing line, the ducks would paddle quickly to where his line was and follow it as he reeled it in. In spite of his moving from place to place to keep far away from the ducks, he did manage to catch a fish.
I heard a teacher on the radio tell about the story of Gideon in Judges 6. When the angel came to tell Gideon that God wanted him to fight against Israel's enemies, he addressed Gideon as "mighty warrior." Isn't that interesting? Gideon hadn't done anything yet. But in anticipation of a great victory, God calls Gideon a mighty warrior. Along with that pronouncement, God promises to be with him.
"When the angel of the Lord appeared to Gideon, he said, 'The LORD is with you, mighty warrior'." (Judges 6:12)
And there's the whole reason God could address him as a hero before he had even gone into battle: because God was going to do the fighting for him. It reminded me of David's confidence in Psalm 18:29 and 2 Samuel 22:30 (both verses have the exact same wording): "With your help I can advance against a troop; with my God I can scale a wall."
Scripture is full of God's promises to always be with us and to fight our battles for us. With God, the victory is assured.
"I can do everything through him who gives me strength." (Philippians 4:13)
"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 12:9)
"He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak." (Isaiah 40:29)

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