Aha

This past week has seen some beautiful fall weather and we've been able to enjoy it.  On Monday afternoon, Dawn called to ask if she and the girls could come over to play.  Andy and Kira went to the neighbor's trampoline to do their usual romping.  Their hilarious playing attracts the neighbor girls who then come out to join them.  They chase each other around and around, laughing and giggling - it's such fun to watch them having fun.

Tuesday was also a beautiful day so after lunch, we met Dawn at Long Bridge Park for some playground time with the girls and a little hike to the lake.

Kira was our map reader/trail guide par excellence!  And very serious about her role!

I am happy to report that we are in a somewhat stable mode.  Andy saw his urologist on Wednesday (the last doctor appointment on the schedule until the spring!  Yippee!).  We got a very good report at that visit and the doctor said he doesn't have to go back to him for a year.  Yeah!

We saw an incredible number of doctors this past year.  It seemed like every Tuesday was taken up with an appointment to one or another of them.  Andy feels good physically and continues to work hard at his exercises.  "He looks good," and we have to laugh because that seems to be what everyone tells us whenever they ask how we're doing.  

You know, how certain conditions get an automatic response from people.  When a woman is pregnant, the common question is:  "how are you feeling?"  When the baby is born, "are they sleeping through the night?"  etc.  So for us now, the common response is:  "You look good!"

So we laugh and agree, "Yes, Andy does look good!"

I know feeling well is helping him to be more engaged.  He also works hard at entering into conversations, although depending who he is with determines how difficult it is for him to put his thoughts into words.

I was talking with a friend a week or so ago about how often the Bible tells us to be thankful.  

1Thessalonians 5:18:  "Give thanks in all circumstances..."
Philippians 4:6:  "...in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving..."

I was sharing that as much as I wanted to, I just could never thank God for taking our baby boy.  Yes, there were many things in the situation that I could thank God for...especially the experience of the nearness of God and how He ministered to us during that time.  And now that Andy has this horrible disease, how can I give God thanks for this?  Again, I am very thankful for many of the blessings we enjoy even in this difficult time:  friends and family who surround and support us, our financial needs are being met in incredible ways, the place we live is just right for us right now, and innumerable other many things that fit together for us.  

Then it came to me in an "aha" moment.  God doesn't say we should be thankful FOR everything; but IN everything, we are to give thanks.  He doesn't expect us to be thankful for the effects of the fall:  death, illness, hardships.  But in those hard times, we can find things to be thankful for.  Most of all, for His presence and enabling grace to endure with patience and joy.  

I have been reading Paul Tripp's book, Forever.  

He writes some very powerful truths.  This life is not all there is.  And God is not our genie in the sky to make our life easy and comfortable.  He has a bigger plan.  He is more committed to my eternal good than my present ease.  He is in the business of transforming us into the image of His Son.  

"And how does God transform us?  He has chosen to keep us for a while in this terribly broken world, where he patiently uses surprise, hardship, disappointment, and trial to prepare us for the perfection that is to come.  You could argue that the universal experience of people this side of forever is suffering.  God doesn't allow us to be exposed to and personally experience these things because he doesn't care for us, but precisely because he does.  With patient grace, he employs the hardships of life in this fallen world as his tools of redemption.  He knows how self-righteous and self-reliant we can be.  He knows how strong our trust is in our own wisdom and strength.  He knows we think we're okay and the other guy is in need of redemption.  So he leads us into situations that take us way beyond the limits of our own strength and wisdom.  He uses difficulty to expose our weaknesses of character, wisdom, desire, thought, word and action.  And he does all of this so that we will admit our need, cry out for his help and receive his transforming grace."

Oh, I have so far to go.  I am far from mature and complete, so I should consider it pure joy for the trials I am facing because they are working together for my good.

James 1:2-4:  "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.  Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."