Retirement

For a number of years I've been thinking of retirement.  When should I retire?  What will I do when I retire?  I can't wait to retire.

 

When I turned 60, I went into Pastor's office and told him that in 2 years, I would be able to collect social security.  Well, 62 came and went, and I kept working but still thinking and dreaming of retiring.  I was thinking things like, "I'd just love to be home every day with no responsibilities and nothing to do."  It sounds kind of selfish, doesn't it?  And realistically, would I be happy if I had nothing to do?

Well, my thoughts have been taking a different turn recently.  The Lord has been leading me to reading material that challenged me in my journey. One of those was a book entitled, Mary Slessor of Calabar: Pioneer Missionary.  What an amazing woman she was.  What impressed me as I read Mary's story was how determined she was to keep working in spite of the way she felt.  She was often ill with fever and other tropical diseases but she felt the call of God to continue the work He had led her to.  Even at the end of her life when she was no longer able to walk, she had men carry her to the villages where she taught the natives about God and the Bible. 

Mary's example really ministered to me.  Here I am in a comfortable job, requiring little of me other than getting up every morning, driving 1 mile, working with people who love me and God.  Granted I am not Mary and I should not beat myself up because I'm not "suffering for Jesus" and my life isn't as difficult as hers.  However, I couldn't help but think that this life is a prelude to the next.  What am I doing to get ready?  Why do I think I need to retire now when I'll have all of eternity to rest and enjoy life in heaven.

re·tire·ment

/riˈtīrmənt/

Noun The action or fact of leaving one's job and ceasing to work. The period of one's life after leaving one's job and ceasing to work.

Synonyms retreat - seclusion - withdrawal - superannuation I'm not crazy about the synonyms of retirement, especially the "seclusion" and "withdrawal" ones.  Do I really want to withdraw and become a hermit?  I can't imagine that. Then, too, I've been reading and journaling for my devotionals this year from Oswald Chamber's My Utmost for His Highest.  Some of the thoughts: My life is not my own.  I have been bought with a price.  I did not choose Jesus, but He chose me and appointed me to the task He has given me.  Do I bring God into my plans?  I love to organize and administrate, but do I consult Him and trust Him if my plans don't go as expected? Do I serve the Lord by doing it my way or do I listen to His voice and wait for His instruction? Am I recklessly abandoned, totally surrendered and separated by God for one purpose?  To proclaim the gospel of God?  (Romans 9:3) Do I ask God for petty personal things that have to do with my comfort and nothing to do with the furtherance of the gospel? Am I ready to be poured out as a drink offering?  Philippians 2:7.  Am I willing to be poured out, used up, spent, not seeking to be ministered to, but to minister?  This reminds me of the old hymn: Must I be carried to the skies On flowery beds of ease, While others fought to win the prize and sailed through bloody seas? Oh I must fight if I would reign Increase my courage, Lord. I'll bear the toil, endure the pain Supported by Thy Word. In the face of persecution, the early Christians did not pray for comfort and safety, they prayed for courage!  See Acts 4:29. My life of service is the way I say thank you to God for His inexpressibly wonderful salvation. Do I allow God to be the source of all my dreams, joys and delights? On Sunday we sang a Robin Mark song:  Jesus, All for Jesus.  As I'm singing it, I'm asking myself, do I really mean what I'm singing?  Jesus, all for Jesus, All I am and have and ever hope to be. Jesus, all for Jesus, All I am and have and ever hope to be. All of my ambitions, hopes and plans I surrender these into Your hands. All of my ambitions, hopes and plans I surrender these into Your hands. For it's only in Your will that I am free, For it's only in Your will that I am free, Jesus, all for Jesus, All I am and have and ever hope to be. I'm not my own, I've been bought with a price. I want to want what God wants.  His way is best and He does what is best for me.  It's only in His will that I am truly free and happy. He has given me the gifts that I need for the job He has given me.  How can I think of not using those gifts for Him when they help the body of Christ and bring me fulfillment and joy? So until God shows me clearly that I need to stop working, I will keep on keeping on.  Lord, help me.  I live in a culture that needs to know.  If I have a question about anything, the answer is mine as soon as I type "google."  But God doesn't operate that way.  He wants me to trust Him enough to wait.  I love the verse in Isaiah 64:4:  "God...who acts on behalf of those who wait for Him."  He knows the end from the beginning and His ways are best.  I can trust Him with my life and future.